The strength to overcome - Do we have what it takes?

All rights reserved by 2008 Adam Rhine, @ Hebrew Art

Hello dear reader,

My what a hot day it has been here in Portland, OR! The hottest point I believe was 95 degrees, with I would imagine anywhere between 20%-30% humidity. But it is nothing that ice cream, and a couple of cold frappuccinos can't fix!

      So today I wanted to touch upon the subject of the ability to overcome. The younger brother of mine whom I study Torah with daily is a bit of a "wet blanket" to coin an old term. Undoubtedly when a long series of events that seem to keep you down rather than allowing you even a small respite and access to upward momentum, it takes a large amount of inner strength to move forward, put a smile on your face, speak and think positive. As the eldest, I have certainly made my share of mistakes, and met more trials of error in my life to know that the strength required to be positive can either come naturally, or it is learned. I have had to train myself over the last few years on this matter, and I think it has worked well for me. A keen sense of self-awareness is key to understanding how we project ourselves and the resulting way we affect those around us. Unfortunately there is such a thing as being too positive, deluding yourself and creating false expectations to grand to be within your abilities or current situation in which you find yourself. That of course does not mean you should not have goals, and dreams. It is one thing to expect something, than it is to create goals, points to shoot for no matter how near or far in the future they may be.

      My dear Aunt and Uncle are dreamers. And L-rd knows I have such great respect for them because of this and many other fantastic attributes that HaShem has blessed them with. They have this refrigerator that is tastefully adorned with pictures from magazines ranging from Jerusalem where they would like to visit once more, a very sophisticated and professional closet for a man who dresses well (my auntie dresses very well in fine pinstriped suits, and fedoras. Haha, just kidding. She stopped going drag years ago. *snickers*), a dream car, a dream house, and a magnet I brought back from Japan which is another place they want to take a trip to. Maybe it is not so important exactly what they have on their kitchen appliance, but the fact that they have anything there at all. They are two very hardworking people who have surrounded themselves in dreams and goals, and it is the most consistent and probably my fondest memory of them that I will carry with me always. We all know how to dream. I'm a horrible day dreamer, and I tend to think too far ahead in the future as my wife constantly reminds me (She's right too. A very wise woman might I add.), but it is them who showed me how to truly dream. How to set goals. Real ones. Showed me how to be realistic.

      Needless to say it is this and many other skills that I try to impart upon my brother as he tends to always been "down in the dumps" as the adage goes. There are times when he can be a perfectly good goofball, but most times he is negative, and has gotten into the easy habit of saying the deplorable word CAN'T. I have learned over the years that I truly despise that word. I would prefer to say things like:

• Presently I am lacking in the ability to...
• It is a bit out of my spectrum for the moment...
• That is above my pay grade (My fellow military service members will giggle at this one. Hehe)
• At the present time, I lack to means.

      I am sure that if given enough time this evening I could pull more things out of this humid air to add to this list, but I'd rather move forward. If we simply examine these four phrases I think you may find that they all share something in common: They are not anchored in fatality. They instead say that while currently I am unable to do it, that does not mean I cannot do it in the future. Maybe you're looking at the "pay grade" one, a common saying in the military, and wondering "How is THAT one temporary?". Last I checked we had this really neat even the mystics of the olde ways of yore called promotion. Yep, get promoted and then you can do it. See? Things are only as permanent as you allow them to be. Sure promotions can be tough, but at least you're trying your best. If you do not make it, you can look back and still tell yourself and those around you that you gave it your best shot.

      What of bad attitudes? I'm a big believer that the body directly reflects how you feel, or allow yourself to feel. Even in the dreariest times, I try to never allow myself to look as bad as I feel. I walk upright, with fantastic posture [If I don't say so myself], a smile on my face, a clean measured high tone of voice, and allowing my face to project a sense of contentedness, and welcome. Because of that I find it easy to make new friends, even if I am naturally painfully shy. I just chalk it up to an overly nurtured sense of humility [Yeah, THAT was humble].

      This ability to hold yourself physically, and emotionally upright are skills not far off from you. G-d would never put something in your path that He knew you could never overcome. He would truly be a cruel G-d if that were the case. So allow me to skillfully touch on sin now. [Mission accomplished, I've hooked ya!]

       Sin is an awfully interesting concept. In the secular world we have come to ignore it outright because it has strong religious overtones. Instead we call it something to the tune of "unlawful infraction" or some such nonsense. When we give into the Yetzer hara, or The Evil Inclination, we don't just separate ourselves from those around us, but also from G-d, and ourselves. I have always felt that if I have done something wrong there is a strange feeling of being uncomfortable in my own skin. As a person who yearns to walk uprightly, should we stumble, there is always that feeling of embarrassment. You know, like that time you were caught doing something you shouldn't have been doing, and you wished you could just be somewhere, or someone else for that moment? Well, we can say that the same feeling applies here. Although, I am unsure if other people share this same sentiment, but if I find that I have stumbled somewhere, I know deep down I need to correct whatever it is. Once making that correction you feel fine again. Why? Because you've reconnected yourself. For a moment you were short fusing, but now the connection was made healthy and whole again. Teshuvah [prayerful repentance] as well as tzedakah [charity], these are the bandages, and medic kits for your soul.

      This is why I have had such a fundamental problem with Christianity due to these simple actions that our forever merciful L-rd G-d provided for us. I really feel that when we read our Torah, G-d is speaking to us directly through every single letter. Every single word. And what is the first thing G-d says to Cain in Genesis 4:7?

Genesis 4:7 "Why are you annoyed, and why has your countenance fallen? Is it not true that if you do good, you will be forgiven? But if you do not do good at the entrance, sin crouches; its longing is towards you, yet you will rule over it."

      Rashi goes on to expound this and points that "yet you will rule over it, if you want to, you can overcome it [sin]". Basically G-d is telling Cain, "Is it not true that if you improve your actions it will be forgiven for you?"

By having this basic understanding and very first real account of G-d's willingness to provide forgiveness, as well as the first notion that moving forward to walk in an upright manner is not outside your limits. The very first teaching we get concerning sin and mercy is right here, and yet it is so easily ignored and glossed over.

      So let's take this fact that having the strength to not just rule over our yetzer hara and rule over the challenges we find in life, but also rule over the negative thoughts, emotions, and feelings that can plague us to the core.

      I always tell my soldiers, friends and family: Forward momentum is what we should always strive for. Without movement we have no potential energy. It is no coincidence that the scientific term of potential energy has the word potential in it.


Lilah tov and be well,